


Misunderstanding

by Ann369



Category: War (2019)
Genre: Angst, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Depression, Khalid has self-worth issues, Love Confessions, M/M, Sad, Self-Worth Issues, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:55:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23547988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ann369/pseuds/Ann369
Summary: Everyone thinks Khalid is dead until they finally finds him. Can Kabir really deal with the pain the love of his life gives him?
Relationships: Kabir/Khalid
Comments: 5
Kudos: 8





	1. Blooming in the winter

Kabir actually thought it was over,but that only lasted until they arrested Dr.Malika singhal,the plastic surgen who gave sourabh Khalid's face. When they searched her hospital, everyone went into a trance of shock. Khalid Rehmani was alive,but he was in a comatose state. They immediately moved him into their care,but they still had doubts. Malika singhal was a really good surgeon, this could also be someone else like sourabh.  
Khalid was in an induced coma,which made Kabir worry more. He informed Khalid's mother and she was more than happy to know that her son was alive, even if she knew it could also be someone else. 

2 Weeks later

Khalid slowly opened his eyes. His body felt stiff. The surroundings looked unfamiliar. He tried to remember what happened, but the last thing he remember is running after Sourabh. He tried to wake up then he noticed that he was surrounded by hospital machines. He pressed the call button twice and a nurse ran towards him.

___________________________________________

Khalid was trying to eat some normal meal,but his hands were constantly shaking, he couldn't walk or sit straight without hepl.Fuck! He felt useless. He noticed kabir, Aditi and his colonel coming to his room,not wanting to look weak infront of them,he stoped . This feels humiliating, he wanted to go on missions and do his job but all he's able to do is just sit there . He tried to stand up when colonel and the 2 others came close to him,  
"Please,just sit khalid" there was sympathy in his voice and Khalid hated it,he didn't need sympathy from anyone .  
"How do you feel khalid?" Aditi asked.  
"Better,Aditi" he thought he sounded a bit pathetic,still he tried to give a small smile.  
"So i was thinking you might be needing rest,do u wanna stay here or go home?"  
"I would like to go home,sir. It would be better". Khalid answered. He also noticed that Kabir was not even looking at him. The conversation didn't went on much. Khalid needs special care to walk again or do daily jobs. His body was weak being on coma for a year. Oh my God! Khalid thought, a year is so long, how much did he miss?  
Khalid was feeling restless on the way to home and at his house. His mind was filled with questions, he felt betrayed. He tried to see fix the whole puzzle together. 

The day of they went to attack Ilyasi,everything was under control until the shooting started. Kabir was supposed to give him orders,but he didn't. Khalid remembers going after Sourabh because he didn't knew what to do next,It was kabir. Kabir had betrayed him, ofcourse. After all he's the son of a traitor, "The traitor who killed Kabir's partner. He couldn't believe Kabir did this on purpose. He trusted the man blindly, he feels so stupid now.  
Then he remembered the look on Kabir's face at the hospital, like he was disappointed, disappointed that Khalid isn't dead. He suddenly wanted to punch something.   
A night before the holi celebrations, he actually thought Kabir finally trusted him.

"Tum ye daag-waag mittane ke naatak kar raha dha ye main pehle din se hi jaanta thaa. Gadhaar ke bete ho,gadhaari tumhare ghoon mein hain. Even if man can move a mountain, but not from his upbringing. Tumhare ye game main pehle se hi jaanta thaa,bus intezaar kar raha dha ki kab tum voh galat katam utaaoge.

(I knew you were just putting on a show to clear your family name since the first day, You are son on a traitor,Unfaithfulness is in your blood.Even if man can move a mountain, but not from his upbringing ,i knew your game from the very start. But i was waiting for you to make the wrong move)  
Khalid was torn,he had a thousand questions in his head,he was being complete genune,wasn't he? What is his role model Kabir accusing him of then?  
But then kabir continued;  
But tumne mujhe hara diya Khalid, you proved that you have the blood of your mother through your veins,not your Fathers.

His heart lightened up at that. He finally got what he always dreamed of. But he didn't knew kabir was only playing trustworthy to kill him the other day to revenge the death of his partner. He sighed angrily.  
___________________________________________

Kabir's POV  
He couldn't stand this,he knew this was his Khalid,laying on the hospital bed. He feels awful . It was his duty to protect him,he failed in it . He couldn't watch the boy he loved on the bed like that . So he kept his eyes somewhere wandering. If he looked at Khalid he knew he would be torn apart. He wanted to hug Khalid and keep him in his arms,kiss him forehead and tell him everything is going to be fine,tell him that he's so strong .He wanted to keep hm close to his chest and let all his emotions out. He lived a year believing that his boy was dead,he couldn't stand it,but he had to be strong for his country. Now his baby biy was infront of him and he's scared to do anything at all. He wished that the connection of their phones weren't lost that day,he screemed for Khalid to go back and be safe, but Khalid heared nothing. May be i should go and visit Khalid. He drove to Khalid's house.

At the house.  
Khalid saw Kabir heading in. His blood boiled. Is kabir here to kill hkm because his older plan failed. He thought with bitterness. Kabir came and stood infront of him,eyes looking down.  
"What happened sir,disappointed that your plan didn't workout " Khalid asked with venom in his voice.  
"Yes khalid,and I'm sorry about it, I really think that i should do atleast something, you know" Kabir said calmly assuming that Khalid was talking about the failed mission.  
"So you're here to kil me by yourself? Do it Kabir,i don't feel like living anyway,i feel useless and worth less,I'm just a living garbage at the moment" he said actually meaning it.  
Kabir couldn't process it. What is Khalid talking about?kill him? Why?  
"Khalid what are you talking about?why would i kill you?" Kabir actually wished he heared it wrong.  
"You planned the mission to kill Ilyasi,he was under your thumb and the great soldier Major kabir couldn't kill him And he forgot that they all had bluetooth earphones to communicate . You left me there to die. It was all a part of your plan, right? I can't believe i used to worship you,Kabir. You were just acting nice to kill me the next day?" He sighed. "Go on. Shoot me" he closed his eyes.  
Kabir was stunned. How could he believe that. I would never kill khalid,he is one of the most dedicated soldiers he had known and he loves him. Why did khalid think of him this bad? It was all his fault. His eyes began to fill up with tears. This is so wrong. Major Kabir never cried,but now he feels helpless,something inside him burns hot and its killing him.   
Khalid slowly opened. He was shocked. Why was Kabir crying, may be this is just another act ?  
" Khalid,that day saurabh cut off the network of our phones during the shootout so we won't share any message. It was my duty to protect you and i failed. I'm truly sorry for it,i beated myself up for 1 year because i failed you. But what you just said it is not true. I never thought of you like that." He took a long deep breath to continue his words.  
" I would never try to kill you or even hurt you,because when you are hurt it hurts me. It hurts to see you looking so fragile and it hurts even more because it was because of me. And .......you are not a waste of space or weak,you are India's one of the best RAW agents,you are one of the strongest man I've ever seen and ....and you are the man i love and I'd give up anything for you.. I love you khalid. I know you don't feel the same about me. But please just don't hate me".  
Kabir turned to leave but he stopped, he turned around and looked at Khalid who's eyes were red and crying. "I'm so...,"  
Before Khalid could finish the sentence kabir pulled him to a kiss. It was fierce and passionate. Kabirs hand were pulling Khalid's hair and the other was around his waist,hugging him closely. Khalid returned the kiss,it was an apology. Kabir understood it. Khalid's hands were on his biceps,keeping himself in balance. Khalid opened his mouth for the dominant one and it continued like a minute . Kabir slowly pulled away from Khalid. His eyes had a passion inthem that Khalid had never seen before. "I'm sorry " were Kabir's final words to the stunned man before he stormed out of the house. Khalid had never felt more guilty in his entire life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a suicide attempt in this chapter, I warn you. Don't read if it triggers you..

God! This was not what he wanted. He should have never assumed this far,it was all his overthinking. I don't even know how to make this right,even after he apologize will kabir look at him the same again?  
No! He have no idea how to make it alright.  
He have failed. He have always been a failure. A disappointment,now the guy he loved also hates him. This is too much to handle.

He wanted to call his mother. But he stopped. He always wanted to make her proud,failing miserably every time.  
One day when he was in school,a group of bullies almost killed him. According to them it was a way of showing their devotion to their nation. But have anyone ever thought about how they make others feel over things they have no control over? At 17 he was really lanky with long hair. He wasn't done growing up yet,people then began to bully him over his looks too. He didn't had a neat house while growing up, it was a small place near the street and the other students always made fun of him. Every fathers day the other kids parents visited the school and joined the celebrations,a kid then jocked about how they never want Khalid's father there because he didn't wanted the school to be attacked by terrorists. He was son of a traitor, no one in his life ever failed to remind him that.   
Was it his fault that his father was a traitor?  
No  
He didn't had control over it. He never had control over his life. He was fucking miserable!! Even after doing his very best he's a disappointment to himself and his mother.

His self confidence was at the lowest point before he joined the RAW. In this condition he don't think he can ever go back again. This is it,I'm done doing this. I can't take this anymore.   
He walked towards his bedroom with a walking stick. He looked at the picture of his mother smiling.   
"I'm sorry, ammi" he said. There was tears in his eyes. He took a butterfly knife from the drawer,walked towards the bathroom. Khalid filled the tub with water and sat in it with clothes on. He stared at his hands. The marks of years of battling with depression was on his arms,marks of small cuts he made to make feel that he was alive. He was just so useless. Khalid was shaking and, eyes were red.  
Before doing it Kabir's face came to his mind. He loved the guy! God,he wished he was born somewhere else. In a reality where he and kabir were together, his father wasn't a traitor and he got a normal childhood. He wished he could kiss that beautiful lips and stare into those light green orbs until he's satisfied. But no,he can't. Because he's Khalid Rahmani, son of a traitor, a disappointment and a guy who's scared to face life.   
He made a cut on his right wrist,making sure the wain was cut. Thank God he had high pain tolerance after years of getting hurt almost every day. Just to be sure,he cut his left wrist too. He wanted to be dead before someone found him.   
Khalid stared at the blood coming out of his wrists. It was dark and turned the whole water in the porcelain tub red. The tub was overflowing, making the floor messy too. He asked forgiveness from his mother once more. Within minutes he could feel his life draining out of him ,it didn't hurt anyone.   
Black spots began dancing in his vision. Khalid couldn't focus anymore,he finally gave up and lost his consciousness. Khalid closed his eyes,an endless darkness is the final thing he saw.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if i made any mistakes in the Hindi dialogues,my native language is not Hindi.


End file.
